You came on your own forehead. Just wanted to remind you that.
just let her blow you already, it's practically animal cruelty at this point.
Ok well I'll be up all night studying if you need a wake up call or a place to put your penis.
Just bought a 17 year old 40's while wearing a poncho. This behavior is acceptable until I'm 25.
he stopped midthrust to put on his sex playlist and the first song was 'can you feel the love tonight'
where do you find these guys?
Dan marino should def buy this ambulance. But not this one. I'm gonna fuck this ambulance up
I just found a piece of glass in my ear from Saturday.
Responsible roommate: 1. Someone who takes a huge shit at work so as not to clog the toilet at home.
Hey my vagina is like a company. Everyone has an equal opportunity....
My only regret this past weekend is abusing only 3 substances when I could have done so much more.
I slept with a Brazillian Man, That's why I'm Watching The World Cup
Wanna see if we can get cut off at bdubs again? The same hipster manager that is younger than us is working again
please don't forget about the bread in the toilet i am absolutely not dealing with that
I think I was just motorboated by a 4-year old girl.
i'm sitting in my room 'bout to smoke a bowl. also, i found out that you don't need a permit to own a tiger in wisconsin, so we're buying one when we move in together.
Randomize
