i guess. but if i can salvage this and still somehow see you naked i feel like that's a win
just went home with some hot chick. she has posters of the jonas brothers in her room. i basically ran out of the house.
ok, his religious views on facebook are madonna lyrics. we no longer have to wonder about his sexuality.
I wish we never smoked. I'm literally laying in bed opening and closing my eyes, just hoping a hot dog stand will appear in the room.
remeber the saying "bad choices make good memories" dude our bad choices dont even make memories.
If she wasn't my friend I'd think she was a huge slut
The difference between what I would do for a regular Klondike bar and an Oreo flavored Klondike bar is astounding
is it STILL halloween? when did this turn into a week long holiday
Had sex five times today because there was nothing else to do. I had no idea snow days could get even better than when we were kids
Your philanthropic work just got me laid, thanks dad for naming me #2.
Your texting shows a blood alcohol level of .12
Beer and cheesecake and spinning in cirlcles why did you let me do this to myself
Only great wives bring your dope to you when you are at the Cardiologist
I put miralax in my rum/coke. Go hard or go home.
You just wait. When you see me foam roll naked, you're going to lose your mind.
Randomize
