You cheat on me once, shame on me. You cheat on me with a white girl, it's fucking over
me and this guy in my office just exchanged an "i saw you at a drag show last night" look as he passed by my desk.
The savings from $3 shots still doesn't add up to plan-b
On a scale of "impaired judgement" to "Mel Gibson," how drunk are you?
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Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My last google search last night was 'vodka swimming pool'.
Holy christ fuck what has my trainwreck of a life come to just blew a 17 year old so help me god
i don't know what happened by from the looks of her lipstick I'd say she was skull fucked by a rhino
The more and more I drink I keep rationalizing banging eye patch girl
I couldn't find my shirt this morning so I stole one from his eight year old sister. Slutted up my outfit quite a bit.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We are gunna have the best winter break smoking weed and eating ham
You chugged 6 beers in a row and then outed your boss at a party last night.
Awk moment when I forgot to tell my hookup about visitor parking so he got towed
DAMN HIS BEARD AND ABILITY TO USE TOOLS ON A LADDER!!
He fucked my brains out then fed me cheese and peanut butter. I might be in love.
You thought they were asking for volunteers for a karaoke contest so you jumped up not realizing it was actually a "last 3 minutes boxing match". But you took that right hook like a champ.
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