Yea, forget your mom. She will be home after her one night stand.
Yes because finding a guy to give head to is pretty difficult.
I mean not really
Obviously that's why it was a joke you are so stupid it's impossible.
my 12 year old sister just told me how admirable it was that i felt comfortable going out with my friends dressed "like that"
If you try to operate on me with a Bic pen and vodka, I'm never talking to you again
Tried to bribe the bartender with wedding cake. Felt bad for not giving her a tip.
one night of dollar margs at dinner and dollar beers at the bar later, i am throwing up in his shower and gurgling soap and water to kill the taste of sin in my mouth. dollar days need to stop endng like this.
Ok now a guy in a winnie the pooh costume is grinding on some chick to the song shots
I don't want anything to do with the Darth Vader stripper babe. I'm just trying to make dreams come true.
I keep looking at his nude pics and crying because ill never see it in person again.
Just saw a woman trying to order Mcdonalds at a trash can. God bless America.
So the guy I hooked up with during welcome week just tried to booty call me from across the lecture hall at 9am. I don't think he gets how this works...
Pulled a muscle in my back masturbating. But still listed as probable.
I can no longer play with you. I puked on my feet in the shower. I'm too old for this.
All I did was call him a fucker when he took my pot. He didn't have to arrest me.
Haha I wasn't coming anyway. I'm watching Snow White and don't want to put pants back on. Those are completely unrelated. Have a good night.
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