Bro can a girl get pregnant if i jizz in her mouth?
no, he's only a walking dick if he mans up. right about now he's just a walking transgender.
We were having sex on the balcony and this guy walked by, so drunkily i said "dont move, he cant see us if we dont move."
he fingered my asshole thinking it was my vag...I couldn't bring myself to tell him, mostly from shame for me and pity for him
People Are Arguing Over This Guy’s Petty Reaction To Splitting Lunch With His Co-Worker
I think the world might be a better place if everyone was capable of having open relationships.
I had to do a class evaluation today & the girl beside me didn't fill in any bubbles she just wrote in huge letters RETIRE across the whole sheet
So apparently the bar gave out free condoms, which I now have a pocket full of. Why is drunk me shoving the fact that I'm single and not getting laid in sober me's face...
Until this weekend, a man hadn't made me orgasm since the night Obama was elected. Now THAT is change I can believe in.
If by "Are you drunk?" you mean "Did you just faceplant in the checkout line at Target?" the answer is yes.
Girl Logs Into Twitter Only To Find Out Her Dad Is Trending For The Most Outrageous Reason
Holy crap, church bells in Cibolo just scared the hell out of me. I'm pretty sure they were yelling sinner at me.
I'm seriously considering refraining from drinking on school nights.
I like how you say that with 4 school days left of the school year..
Surely the maintenance men have seen worse than that condom right
Idk what the interview would be like but I imagine you in a suit and tie surveying a nervous freshman and eventually leading him into a labyrinth of debauchery and clapping him on the back, saying "welcome to the fraternity, son"
I think he should just go away to a small penis island and never come back
Woke up with 5 texts apologizing from a number I named "guy who elbowed me in face"