I used to have a blog that was basically all about ****** and all of his sexual misadventures
I mean it made tucker max look like a fucking alterboy
But unfortunatley his mom did a google search and found it
Can a clitoris grow tomatoes? Its symbolic and rhetorical.
This random guy asked me if I had downs. I was like up yours! And I got out of his car.
the sex wasnt even worth changing my sheets
He violated my cat. I was not impressed.
Just walked in on the Yellow Ranger getting porked by a guy in a UD Blue Hen costume. Will somebody PLEASE think of the children.
We got the idea to smoke under his bed because, and I quote, "it'd be just like going camping"
She tried to kill herself by taking a whole packet of panadol. I mean HELLO THAT'S ME EVERY SUNDAY MORNING.
Like I had no idea he knew how to play girls the way he played me. His major is chemistry for christ's sake.
you had me at cake vodka
Is "when in doubt date the guy with the bigger dick" a good philosophy?
I don't know if you've ever seen a group of 20 year olds reenact a rectal prolapse, but 'majestic' isn't really the word I'd use...
Why would you get kicked out?
Well, an overweight man is currently not wearing a shirt. Or pants. And is getting in touch with his inner Chippendale. You can probably fill in the blanks.
Do you realize our room single-handedly hooked up with most of that wedding party last night?
Bro i just made a pipe out of a mechanical pencil and the top to an eye drop bottle. Does that make me some kind of pot god?
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