Moved my bed either I'm a whore or every guy I have ever slept with hid condom wrappers under my bed
I am at the gas station and there is a whole amish family here I'm not sure why the amish need gas but I think its worth investigating
dude totally just got the jungle juice out of my white top. i am really ready to be a trophy wife.
I don't think the TSA agent thought getting iced while searching my bag was as funny as I did.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Yeah i knew he wasn't okay when he told me he was "seeing his vision"
Dude, we took our shirts off and set our chest hair on fire. That's a low point.
You raise a valid concern
It was a cry at the bar alone type of night, served with a side of passing out facedown in my nachos.
He's more than prepared to help us move. Dude brought sunscreen, cans of Coke, and Captain Morgan.
He tried to give me a shoulder massage while i peed in the neighbors bushes to "make it more relaxing."... I let him... That drunk
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
THEY HAVE VIAGRA FLAVORED GELATO
Wtf are freshmen gonna think when the first thing they see in a pale 6'4 white kid with a mustache yelling ya man and we be liming in a Trinidadian accent
I feel like we have a good system here turning our sketchy decisions into great stories.
Meh, all I have to do tomorrow is proctor an AP test. No loud noises and no physical activity allowed for almost 4 hours. Sounds like the perfect recovery period for a hangover.
I took an uber home at 6am. Went to Santanas, apparently they don't take american express. So the uber driver bought my burrito. Success!
like honestly, the vodka had to go somewhere, and your moms soap dispenser just seemed right at the time..
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