Bro can a girl get pregnant if i jizz in her mouth?
hahahahahahahahahahaha
he puts the penis in happiness.
I put the beer in my little red riding hood basket.
I could give you a full detailed description of 75% of the penises in that room
I skipped class, don't know why though bc all I did in the meantime was cook pancakes and watch infomercials..my life sucks
well hello there hangover. fancy meeting you here on this BRIGHT thursday morning.
woke up in nothing but a glued-on tiger tail. they used super glue.
I joined a mariachi band. they gave me a guitar because i told them i could play. It actually turned out ok
They kicked me out of the mariachi band. Turns out I'm not that good
she said we were using the spray butter as air freshener
I realize now that I left my pants on that table in the downstairs bathroom at you house on Tuesday....
there was a fucking fire juggler. but it was ok bc i was in the kiddie pool and it was the safe zone
i'd say i'm about at weeping-uncontrollably-in-a-puddle-of-my-own-tears-and-urine level
I tried to talk to him, but he didn't recognize me at first. I had to show him the top of my head and then he remembered.
I think the saddest part about my sex life is that most of it is pity sex.
I was so gone I thought the cops banging on my door were kids from the party trying to get into my room... needless to say, I started moaning louder so they would take the hint.
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