you didnt say anything until i brought it up today. i guess i misjudged your maturity.
I guess I misjudged your gender.
And, I saw Emily's panties. How? She doesn't sit like a lady.
He jizzed my face. I had to ask for a washcloth. He ran his underwear under the water and handed them to me. Not so romantic.
If penises could fly, my ass would totally be an airport.
do you think women who transgender themselves have the option of getting a circumcised or an uncircumcised dick?
She put up a picture of her grandmother on facebook, looks like the lazy eye runs in the family
The dentist told me I have super glue on my teeth. I'm not blaming you I just want to know how that happened
still using moms red Christmas cookie plate she sent to cut lines on. not sure I can return with a clear conscious
Dave used his AAA card to get my car towed to my house so I could get drunk. Evil genius.
Also this freshmen guy is talking about his gag reflex and no one is making blowjob jokes. I have no faith in the next generation.
If we can put a man on the moon, I'm sure we can turn a pringles can into a bong.
Then that is decided. Fuck away my little bunny rabbit.
I was going through my settings and the phone randomly started playing "Crazy Little Thing Called Love" by Dwight Yoakum. Out loud. At full volume. I was shitting. There were 3 other people in the bathroom. I love iOS 7.
That was so not worth putting pants on for.
My fuck buddy just proposed... Correct me if I'm wrong, but doesn't that completely defeat the purpose of FRIENDS with benefits?
Now you can be friends with Insurance Benefits.
Randomize
