He only uses me for sexual pleasure. The sad part is I don't even feel like a slut. I just I feel like I should just live in the top drawer of his nightstand....for free of course.
Its really not funny anymore. I need to stop shaving while i'm drunk
There are regrets in my world today- mostly jager at that fucking altitude
So can we talk about how we all three made out with the bike taxi driver in lieu of paying him. I'm not even mad, that's resourceful. You know what married girls would have had to do? They'd have had to pay.
He rubs his penis on back when he think I'm sleeping
Precisely. She's an awesome drinking companion; yet, not so awesome mother-in-law material.
I think i can hear god laughing at me and yelling "thou shall pay for thy habits of underage drinking" through a megaphone directly at my eardrums
A girl just told me she printed out my pictures and taped them on her wall. I have to stop sleeping with virgins.
somehow he and i always have our deepest conversations after phone sex.
Well five day drinking adventure in appreciation of cinco de drinko under the belt, great way to start may
Beans, may the odds of a nip slip and drunken make out session be ever in your favor
Please tell me those naked pics were not your mom. Lie if you have to.
must go to store soon wiping with panty liner ugh
Do not try to steal a picnic table from a park, all you will end up with are sore arms and broken dreams.
if i hadn't ended our catfight by hugging you one of us might be dead right now
Randomize
