You're mentally unstable and I would hate to be you
Same, I didn't even get to be tarzan this summer
she was using a pencil to fish crushed adderall out of a plastic bag. it was like a college version of fun dip
You watched "From Justin to Kelly" and sang along to more than half of the songs. I didn't know whether to laugh or to be insanely frightened that you knew almost all the lyrics.
Surefire way to sober up: discover that your car is being towed at 2 am.
Tell nick i'm sorry for throwing a block of cheese at him last night
Whales. Broccoli little trees giant. Magic in cat form. I want my loco and juice. Black in shower. Brb remember life.
Yeah bro I don't know how she's gonna explain the black eye, how else do you tell your boss "my knee hit me in the face during sex last night"
We were playing hot potato with real potatoes at 3am
Currently behind the bar at some asian place, pouring drinks for everyone with a snake around my neck
I'm not sure if it was the 11 shots or your naturally vibrant personality but I recall you being quite noisy that evening
we told the drug dealer that our car was dead and we needed a jump so he would bring the drugs to us...
Then a third Canadian I didn't know showed up to the hotel room at like 3am. I let him sleep in our bed because he had pizza.
You're like the Miss Manners of anonymous gay sex.
Sex in the backyard? Check.
Randomize
