its summer. and we all know college gfs do not count in summer.
college gfs dont count ever. theyre like getting corn rows in jamaica. you feel cool at the time. then you go home and people make fun of you.
You do realize that we bought beer at 9:30 in the morning to avoid sobering up. Stupidity was bound to follow.
we hooked up. but it was that weird mix of getting naked and watching Balto that made it so awesome.
I don't think the car's salesman understands that I am about to vomit on him.
The secrurity code on my debit card is 420, can not lose this card.
Dude she pregamed for her sorority's philanthropy.
Dont eat ANYTHING off the floor at Matt's house. He likes floor sex.
Those titties aren't worth a lifetime of listening to her talk about gluten free yams and japanese manga.
First roommate to find me and dance with me will live. Battle Royale.
Some girl just ordered Chinese delivery to her therapy appointment...
My body is telling me there was tequila. My pictures say it was Jeff's fault
Is there a tactful way to ask "how are your balls?" Or do I just ask point blank
If you find my integrity anywhere, please tell it to come back home
he passed out in the backyard and we used christmas lights as extension cords for the clippers to shave his head.
I got here. Mom yelled "drink of the day is blueberry sangria" and next thing I knew I was on a slip and slide.
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