By the way the awkward moment from yesterday is now a bad situation I have to figure out.
Thank you Grey Goose.
she looks like stephen colbert with that blond wig he was wearing last night.
he mailed me a thank you note for the blowjob.
The irony of calling it Pride is that you do things that no one should be proud of.
I've been watching anime, masturbating and eating nutella for three days. I hope she never comes back.
high as fuck. watching parent trap with my mom. keep missing my mouth.
ive cried into many a lonely burritos..
Any man who has a face like that and a bike, deserves a vagina like yours permanently.
How's my date look?
Like a retarded elf
In a good way
I told her I didn't have a condom. She then sized me with her thumb and finger and tossed me a large. Then I asked her to marry me.
Beans, may the odds of a nip slip and drunken make out session be ever in your favor
Thanksgiving day drinking ended up with me in a shopping cart screaming where are the bitches and condoms. I'd say it went well.
No joke. There's a picture of the priest I made out with on my parents' refrigerator.
Y’all did coke off my Puff The Magic Dragon plate.😂
He has a penis. Therefore, he counts.
Randomize
