He looks like Jesus, if Jesus had let himself go.
i want to fuck
?
it's pretty self explanatory
How do u explain cocaine to a 9 year old?
He taught me where the gears in a five speed are with his penis.
The fact that I'm going to be living with you is starting to make me worry about my heatlh.
Ya that ship has sailed dude
It was total unicorn galloping on a fucking rainbow awesome.
Just got my stitches out.. Now I can give a proper hand job
He either works for the Irish Mob or I'm being Catfished
The point remains that this is the setup for some great stories
Or terrible, horrifying, traumatic experiences
great clearly means different things to us
I don't know, I kept pretending that I was riding an elephant during. It was actually really fun, but you can't tell him that!
All I know is that at 4 am I was walking down the street in my bra and his shorts and Im pretty sure I passed my grandma on her morning walk.
Got drunkdialed by my estranged mom while wallowing in pinkeye drinking 100 proof eating ramen alone. Year summed up perfectly.
I am cleaning melted cheese out of my hair. This is a new experience for me
I dont need your sympathy!!!! Just a fifth of vodka and gummy bears...lots and lots of gummy bears to take my agression out on.
How does it make you feel that I can't control my vagina around you?
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