Fact: Godrick looks like David Archuleta
just found a beer in my hamper. even my laundry is a dirty alcoholic.
Drunk. Just jacked off for the third time in an hour. I love not being Catholic anymore.
I cant prove it..but im almost positive that you were just outside my window watching me while eating out of a bag of Cheetos...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You need 4-7 business day to recover from a fingering like that.
But he found my shoe...that at least deserves a handjob.
Just drank an entire bottle of champagne for lunch. It's gonna be that kind of semester.
I think she's perpetually drunk
It's all she knows
I need to stop ravaging the freshman dorm like a virginity-snatching dragon.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The shit I just took was four, very distinct colors. Jager night was a success
I have nothing to say for myself. When 2chainz comes on at the bar all bets are off.
Update - might be back in your neighbor's good graces. She liked the framed photo I gave her of me on the tractor with my business out.
Dude, tumbleweeds have been rolling through my bed lately. This is my dryest dry spell since I was married.
I know I drink too much cuz "ssssjllapph peneinssesss" automatically comes up in my phone now.
These freshmen are fun! The redhead wants to practice her blowjob skills with me and let me rate different moves!
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