So you refered to him as "monster dick"...not so much
I told her we could go facebook official. If she ups the oral.
I just named my vagina "The Boneyard"
More like "Chia Pet"
maybe i get so drunk and make stupid mistakes cuz Subconsiously im preparing for my real world debut
if i see another status about New Moon, i'm gonna punch a baby
When I try to close my eyes ibwant to puke. Going to the basement to watch pocohantas. That'll keep myeyes open. And puke free.
I decided they need a food cart that just roams around the library like the cotton candy people at the circus. But with real food. like tacos cause it sounds delicious.
well, obviously he didn't fuck me for my strong moral fiber.
He referred to his penis as "a gentle giant" and said I had offended it
Don't come. It's not even a party it's a total sausage fest. Like 20 drunk dudes in a bedroom. We can still drink by ourselves though it'll be ok
Always wear a seatbelt when giving road head. I think I'm just going to tell people I don't remember how I got the fat lip.
You came out of your room naked under your open robe with a mouth full of brownie on a stick and grabbed a fistful of fruit loops and shoved them into your already full mouth.
I think him and kristen are pretty serious now.. I dont think he cheats on her, anymore.
Steven and I talked about running for office again today. It's fucked that my 3 dream jobs are marijuana bakery owner, bar owner, and president.
Sunday morning breakfast with the boyfriends family. I just puked in the stall at Cracker Barrell. Classy.
Randomize
