I boned her and wore a Freddy mask once. It was pretty lol
No see this is how It goes: guys will fuck virgin girls. But girls don't really want to fuck virgin guys. So you're good have no fear.
This Casey James character from American Idol is really gonna mess up my sex life.
Or maybe the fact that you know who Casey James is will be what messes up your sex life.
All I remember was the chick screaming "don't hookup with him! His dick's the size of a cucumber"
The cereal milk was almost black, the bacon was still frozen and the toast was soggy. And that was BEFORE I puked in her lap.
All I had with a note saying that my shoes are in the ceiling and good luck.
Whales. Broccoli little trees giant. Magic in cat form. I want my loco and juice. Black in shower. Brb remember life.
This was just another one of those days you wished you had a penis-size indicator instead of wasting your time isn't it?
hes out at the street wearing a tophat and a monocole and carrying a cane and greeting every car that drives by
he just went across the street and into someones house and we could hear him inviting them over from the front porch
I'm totally wasted about to ride water slides. That's goddamn 'Merican. That and Clint Eastwood.
WHY IN THE FUCK DID YOU LET ME DRUNK PUNCH STEVE? HE IS SUCH A NICE GUY!
Mom just referred to a 9 year old as "this bitch", so I'd say day drinking was a success.
Just gave my thesis presentation, pretty sure I made out with the admissions woman last night.
Awwww breaks my heart, I just wanna fix his teeth and give him a blowjob.
I just want to eat my penis shaped food in front of you and see how you feel about it.
Randomize
