My roommate and I had a nyquil contest. The nyquil won.
That girl would be way hotter if she changed her face.
just found the land before time on youtube... I'm so fucked for finals
I just found out I was conceived in a rehab facility... that's better than finding out your dad could be someone else right?
whiskey dick. though we did manage to break my closet door and flood the bathroom.
Just promise me we won't die tonight. I can't have an autopsy report that reads "stomach contents: Tequila and semen."
Just whatever you do please don't lick his face again.
next time we drink: battle shots.
battle shots or battle shits? if its the first, explain. if its the second I think I figured it out.
WHY IN THE FUCK DID YOU LET ME DRUNK PUNCH STEVE? HE IS SUCH A NICE GUY!
So question... If I'm sexting with uncircumcised guy, do I have to add *then i gently pull your foreskin down*?
At a bar across from the city police station. I PROMISE I will do something great.
Do the right thing and go fuck yourself off a cliff
Drink drank drunk tankkkkn, LETS GO
Okay so I just had a really great idea
no.
He accepted my bet of 5 bucks to bike home completely naked. Never got asked about the 5 bucks, guess he enjoyed it too much
Randomize
