I'd say this is worse than that time when I realized that my favorite bath toy growing up was my Mom's douche bottle.
Well we were just driving down the street, there was a realtor and a couple walking up the porch of a house for sale, mark sticks his head out, opens his mouth to say something, pukes all down the side of the car, pauses, and yells "THIS IS A PHENOMAL NEIGHBORHOOD YOURE GONNA LOVE IT"
this isnt the first time ive seen her dressed as abe lincoln
they would be such cute babies and they would grow up to have huge dicks. and that would make me proud as a mother
Gravity stopped and i'm discussing Greek philosophy with two guys I don't know. There's someone asleep on me. We need to use their dealer.
How drunk are u on a scale of one to couldn't get it up if u had a gun at ur head?
I'm tired of stuffing my fat into a slutty costume. Next year let's go as homeless girls. Cute ones. In leggings with camel toe.
if you need to find her look her up on www.imastupidslut.org
.org?
yeah. they're non profit. helps them sleep at night.
She called it a palate cleanser. She and her friend dike it out once a year before returning to dick
Together or do they pick up? How far do they go? IS AN AUDIENCE PERMITTED? GODAMIT ANSWERS MAN!!!!!!
What happened after I vommed in your shirt that I was wearing and threw it out the window on the highway?
I just sustained a forearm injury dancing to salt n peppa in my kitchen. Fack. I pushed it real good.
HE WAS SUPPOSED TO BE THE TROPHY HUSBAND! I WAS GOING TO BE THE SUCCESSFUL ONE!
I'm feeding a baby and swiping on tinder...what has my life come to?!?!
high I am. I am yoda. Yoda I am
How did the test come back?
I've never been so happy to have a yeast infection. And i got a free pack of birth control
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