So I'm really hungover walking to work and these douches from comcast on bikes ask if they can take a picture with me to show that they're doing their job. The picture: me, this chick from comcast, i'm holding a 2 ft. pixie stick, a comcast flyer and i'm puking in the parking lot. sounds like their doing a good job!
Wednesday. Otherwise known, to you at least, as "there are two gay men in my bed" day.
What I love about college? The kid tripping balls has a kayak made readily available to him on any given Wednesday, Saturday, or Sunday.
He kept telling me that something was trying to enter this dimension from another universe through his spine...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
They're putting plan B in vending machines now. My life just got so much easier.
now that I know that you did coke with your mom I can't look at her the same
Water skiing blazed is the most scary thing I've ever done.
And think got sick again from going outside naked. Word to all females...don't try the naked trench coat thing.
just tried to scoop ice cream with a steak knife. now in the emergency room with a the cab diver and the drag queen he picked up on the way. its gonna be a loooong day.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
People will call it the Wrath of the Froyo. We'll be immortalized.
Also, I've finally come to the point in the relationship when having sex with socks on is ok.
I just hope the day something happens to me my phone just dies, like literally died and will never turn on ever again. I feel like God owes me that much.
Have you seen him ? Seriously. No one is that straight.
That's a gentle way of saying I passed out like an 18-year-old on his first trip to Tijuana
you do realize the next step is naked mud wrestling, right?
Randomize