They have glow in the dark condoms. That's so scary.
Something like a penis light saber.
Too bad my picture didn't come thru. It was one of me naked riding a unicorn with a wizard hat and a magic staff. And the unicorn had wings. And me too.
Why does Jon Cryer have a career?
That is a good question.
I really hope I'm not the first person who's had to wash vomit off of cash and credit cards.
He said he wanted to see my room, not my womb. It's a common mistake.
Ill bet we could have atleast fucked a girl who fucked a guy who has fucked tara reid. That's a famous circle right?
Still trying to wash and scratch the glitter off of my dick. That stripper should be banned.
I still can't believe he turned down that threesome with us in central park. He must be really committed.
I just entered us to win a trip to Vegas for spring break. GET YOUR VAGINA READY FOR THE ULTIMATE DICK HUNT!
Number of twigs I found in my hair: 5
just tried to scoop ice cream with a steak knife. now in the emergency room with a the cab diver and the drag queen he picked up on the way. its gonna be a loooong day.
He looks like he was the one that always had koolaid stains around his mouth as a kid, he can fuck off.
I wish we could all take a bath together. Not in a lesbian way. But in a relaxing drunk in the tub sort of way.
I forgot to lock the bathroom door. He walked in, saw me on the toliet, nodded, and walked back out.
My mom is coming to visit today & it's giving me anxiety. I feel like she can see through me & into the whore I've become.
Randomize
