She's hot and she went to Notre Dame. I want to fuck the Catholic right out of her
What ever happened to making out with a few boob grabs here and there?
we literally hit three floors of our apartment building searching for condoms. also got macaroni.
I'm single as of 11 minutes ago. I was the chick who drunkenly tried to climb into bed with you 2 weeks ago. Wanna make this happen?
I'm all about sex. But even I know there will be a time to retire my junk. And that will be my 40th birthday, or whenever I'm hideous
There is nothing more embarrassing than your birth control alarm going off while in a meeting with your boss and they tell you to take it.
She acts like a 3 year old but with fantastic tits. This girl is the reason women are objectified
her mom went out of her way to book us a room with separate beds... her level of gay denial is in beast mode
I WAS CONCIEVED IN THE BACK OF MY CAR. THATS HOW OLD THIS CAR IS.
...how and why.
PARENTS ARE MAGIC.
Sex on acid. Try it. I thought we were fucking in outer space with fireworks inside a rocketship car. Best.
So, just saw a lady hysterically sobbing in a Walmart at 3 AM. Someone's not having a happy mother's day.
Can I trade you chipotle for a pregnancy test?
I told you about the baby at the graduation party that looked into my eyes and knew I was empty inside
IF THE SUNS NOT EVEN OUT THEN WHY IS HIS DICK OUT WTF
Umm I might be late. Also I am may or may not have mayonnaise on my ass
Randomize
