Do you know of any times in scooby doo when the monster turned out to be a real monster? You know not just a person?
And he just showed me his vera bradley wallet...
nothing says platonic group sex like a campfire and smores
Thursdays are my worst days
but now we sippin champagne when we thirstay?
i just sent my parents are gone come over I have condoms to my mom because Derek changed my numbers while I was passed out
Also managed to rip my pants and set myself on fire. And oddly enough I'm still not ready to ask for 2010 back.
Listen, you need to start thinking with your vagina and not with your heart... That emotional shit is for your 30s.
Oh btw I learned how to say "my penis is a flamethrower" in German. Tonights gonna be fun
Just casually ripping a bowl in the chicken coop, with the chickens. NBD
Apparently I'm not allowed to call at 3am anymore and ask to speak to all his siblings. I was just trying to get to know the family
I forgot about snapchatting a pic of us, but I remember flossing with your hair.
so dehydrated I couldn't fill the pee cup to the right line for my drug test for school. I was like sorry it was my birthday yesterday
We just fucked like crazy and now I'm dipping chips in macaroni & cheese. I feel completely accomplished. This may be the best day ever.
Masturbated while waiting for my face mask to dry, so it was a productive night.
LOOK AT HOW SMOOTH THIS BITCH IS
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