Quick, to the slutcave!
If I was doing exactly what I wanted right now I would be getting fucked on a jet ski while listening to "When Love Takes Over" by Kelly Rowland while eating french fries.
He slapped my ass and hummed the jello theme song, which was followed by an overly loud "IT'S ALIVE!"
You put a thong on my pumpkin didn't you.
Just walked by a group of guys calling out walks of shame with a mega phone from their front porch.
I think his glow in the dark Star Wars sheets, at the time, really turned me on.
Right now, my father is sitting on the couch, totally smashed, crying, eating pringles, and watching the credits of Transformers 2. Love him.
well now i know if i ever need to drive puke and talk on the phone at the same time i can
We hooked up with his aunt passed out next to us. It was just like old times.
Should you consider yourself out of control when everyone at the party is cheering you on while you're puking, and on the last heave you act like you're rolling dice right before the finale???
Some girl just showed me her stretch marks
You need to get out of tn
You need to come back and help me drink our beer so the fridge has room for the other beers
It's seriously like a finger. But it's a cock. I don't know what to do. I feel like I fuck him to be polite.
My fucking earlobe is bruised what the hell
What did you give up for lent?
Diet and excersize. And I'm never going back...
Randomize
