I just had an epiphany. There is NOTHING TO STOP ME from making cake mix and eating it all instead of making a cake. It feels like my entire life has peaked at this moment.
At one point during the moaning he reminded me of Forrest Gump
the dr. explained that the first big patch is called a herald patch since it's biggest. So his name is Harold the Patch.
Wow. You named your rash.
90 In a 65. Talked my way out of it with the i have to poop story. i am the ticket jesus
I would like to apologize for my MANY attempts of trying to motor boat you.
In case you're keeping score at home, this is Brad's SECOND Doritos-related trip to the ER.
Ughhhh. Finnnneeeeee. I'll have sex with your brother. Sheesh. The things I do for you woman.
It was one of those nights where you get back from the bar and end up staying up till 3AM beating off to facebook photos of girls from college
Couldn't find my swimsuit top anywhere this morning but finally found it in the skimmer of the pool so thats how my night apparently went
Did she owns a vibrator that will set off seismic activity.
My penis is saying yes, several less important organs are saying noo...
I'm going to pretend you don't watch My Little Pony and focus on your large cock. Kay? Don't bring it up again.
I'm definitely not going to be able to fuck him high. I won't be able to not laugh at his man boobs
I love you with the passion of a thousand FUCKBOYS during the height of week 1 texting
I should not have moved in with him. He's got porn stashed everywhere like a homosexual squirrel.
You love porn!
Not in the sugar bowl when I'm making my Mom coffee I don't.
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