Yo I'm just eating dinner now. U ready to go out?
Ya ya. Where you eating?
Cereal and beer. U kno u want in.
just bought miller high life, hungry man dinners, and a bottle of lube. you win life, you win.
You remember that guy Joey? The pastors son that plays Jesus every year?
Yeah?
Stuck it in his pooper.
She makes me want to have breakfast margaritas every day
I just remember thinking that if i ran really fast through the house, no one would notice i was naked.
I always figured rock bottom would've involved more hookers
Um I think everyone drunk and there's some douche on violin.
I'm not judging you... I'm judging our friendship
She puked her nose ring out of her face.
He will. He has no choice. What's he gonna do? Find a better fuck buddy? We both know that's not possible. I'm the ideal friend with benefit. Minus snoring and uneven tits.
Hardcore start to spring break. Mike is wearing adult diapers because the only stop we are making is for gas.
I was wearing my get used bookstore shirt when we fucked. Ironic yet appropriate.
We are all yelling at the cat at our apt in nothing but our underwear. How do you think it's going.
In unrelated news guys should not ask what I'm doing/wearing if they can't handle an honest answer. I'm not pretending I'm not sitting on the couch in yoga pants watching Community so you can beat off.
For a second I thought he was going to give me an intervention
You can't give interventions in a bar!
Randomize
