Mel Gibson is dating a 24 year old
You're not Mel Gibson and I'm not 24.
i wish i could "like" people's thoughts in real life like i can on facebook
you can....by speaking....
Did I ever tell u about how my buddy fucked peter coors's daughter and made a tshirt that said I TAPPED THE ROCKIES with her picture on it?
You're going to the beach with me so we can have beach sex whether you like it or not. Get over it. Kthx.
The last time you said "no one will know" is when you ran out of sprite at your birthday party and dumped a handle of straight up vodka into the jungle juice.
I just don't know about this life anymore. Quite frankly I think I belong up there in the great blue, lounging on a cloud sippin tea with Jesus
If I wake up with an unknown penis in me one more time I am literally going to press charges to the makers of tequila.
Just drove past the dude that came in your sock
She literally just cut half her hair off because she's tired of asking someone to hold it back when shes drunk and puking.
Her fucking playlist had randy newman on it. It was like woody was watching the whole time.
I've come to the conclusion that the dicks in Arizona just don't have enough size for me.
I know of an excellent nanny. A lot like Mary Poppins but way cooler. And likes pot.
That guy was cool until he tried fighting that dude in the bow tie. I need better wingmen.
You have not lived until you've had your brains fucked out on a broken down Tunnel of Love ride. Life is good.
the best part is that i get to keep the pot plants and he still has my name tattooed on his ass
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