Since when do you wear a bracelet?
Not a bracelet. Half a pair of handcuffs
She threw up everywhere and is crying about a fictional character who died on Grey's Anatomy
In hindsight, trust falling your grandma was a bad idea. Sorry about that.
All you have to drink is moonshine and ranch. This is bullshit.
Her vagina smelt so bad I lied and told her that I was married just so that she would leave.
I just saw a girl on crutches doing a walk of shame. She is either super dedicated, or her night didn't go as planned.
I sent him a naked picture of me with the caption "I lost at beer pong, this was a dare. Hope your nights going as good as mine" I've never talked to him in my life, this is a strange way to start.
Can we do a version of last night where I actually remember shit?
The plan is that you eat an edible first, then pressure your dad to do one. You know you are down.
with a cock that big I don't even care that he makes a convincing drag queen
don't do it for the experience, do it for the story. now get your ass in that bedroom
Well the good news is ill probably have my new boobs by the time he sees me naked
He ordered a meatball sub with a side of meatballs.
Yes. I am out of condoms. I kept filling them with glow paint and playing with them when I was on mushrooms, which resulted in me having unprotected sex last weekend
When we started the night I was in zebra wedges & she was in my black boots... I woke up wearing pink flip flops & the mirror on my rental is fuxked up. Wtf happened last night?
Randomize
