were having a shit on karen session at work but then she walked in so we used code names instead and she tried to join in like she knew them
I love how its suddenly "not all about sex" now that he can't get it up
Oh no, it isn't official until she poops.
The cab driver just finished telling me how leaving community college after one month was the best desicion he ever made.
is it a bad thing if he can only get off when i start talking like one of the girls from Jersey Shore??
Something about getting head on stairs. I don't know.
Dude, you need to understand there is a fine line between "guilty pleasure" and in the closet gay
It's a sign that no dudes december is about to start: I have a yeast infection.
So mom called me from the hospital laughing her ass off. Apparently my sister is allergic to cocaine...
Nah. After about 5 shots he decided he needed to clean the gutters. We're headed to the hospital now so meet us there.
seriously the second he called my tits warlocks was the second I knew I wasn't going to fuck him.
You were passed out in the OutBack Bowl Shrimp costume and when we asked you wtf happened you just said On Wisconsin.
She has the best kind of daddy issues
I heard a crunch while giving him head. I looked up and he was eating Cheese Itz. So we made a deal that he'd take a hand job so I could eat them too.
I just sharted for the first time in my life. Age 33. Lying in bed. Sober. 2021 is off to a great start!
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