What do you call a girl with PMS and GPS?
A crazy bitch that WILL find your ass!
i was so high i thought his mole came off and was flying around
Drunk, high, and in a taco costume. Wish you were here.
Her father's a cardiologist, her mom's a lawyer...she just went from a 5 to a 10 real quick.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Oddly enough when I decided to stop whoreing myself out... I lost most of my companionship.
No clues in my phone. Only dialed call: my own social security number. And that was before 10:00pm.
Yay for living on the edge. I'm trying this new thing where I stop mom-arming people and promote bad decisions. It's working quite well.
Before he left he told me if his girlfriend ever finds out, she'll take us both to an alley and kill us.
You offered the police officer a Snickers ice cream bar and cried when he wouldn't take it...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If it involves notarization or the Misfits, I am up to date. Anything else, I know fuck-all.
Got so drunk last night I kinda sent a super on point sext to his kid sister...say a prayer man
We probably are going to die. So. Thanks for agreeing to be my Maid of Honor even though I torture you.
You seem like the type to go to a craft sale baked out of your mind. I like you.
you were just in my dream and you looked at me and said "Christmas is cold." I think you're wasted even in my dreams.
Social anxiety problems: I just had to get up and change stalls mid-poop because someone sat down in the one next to mine.
Randomize