In the car with my brother. His CD went from 2pac to Taylor Swift. I'm concerned. It wasn't a mistake, he knows all the words.
You'll be the first to get a "it's herpes simplex 1" cigar.
he woke me up at 3 am to ask me where my plunger, a towel, and staples were. i'm afraid to go into my bathroom.
Poopin on the sidewaaalllkkk. I wish my text told you that was a song
If you see my mugshot on the news tomorrow, its not what you think
When I got up in the middle of the night, puked in his trash can, and snuck out the front door, I pretty sure he knew it was over.
Look at my eyebrows in this pic! We deffo need to go back to that waxing place.
You have a cock in one hand and a shot in the other. Your eyebrows are not the topic in need of discussion.
According to the red cross, I'm not suppose to do anything strenuous for the next 24 hours. That means you're on top.
Turns out he's old enough to be my dad. I'm so excited. I've never had a sugar daddy before. What should I ask for first!? Want anything?
Just saw a couple chasing each other on lawn mowers. Oh South Knoxville.
Dude I'm driving around California right now hiding little bags of weed in random places like Easter eggs so that I can come back and find them later
There were 7 of us cowering in the kitchen because you were swinging a giant, pink double headed dildo around like a nunchuk and hitting anyone who came near you with it.
I'm just glad I met someone who probably won't punch you in the face
What is your friends name that I hooked up with? ....I think j found his credit card under my bed
I ate cake in bed. Felt great
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