i just spit dirty mouth water on my dentist. and apparently grinning sheepishly and saying "my b" doesn't make it better
i just won a 100 dollar gift card to walmart in a karaoke contest...i love kentucky
week 6 of class: i have yet to go to spanish sober. i love being THAT girl.
I feel like I am becoming dumber sitting here in class than I would be sitting on the couch smoking weed.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
any plan I had today of being a productive member of society, I am officially throwing out the window.
my shit smells like andre
His ankle bracelet only gets in the way when I'm trying to take off his pants.
i think im the only person who makes thank you cards for their drug dealer
she said they gang banged her to "who let the dogs out." the dude left of the middle barked along. sounds like a good time.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i take my contacts out every time we fuck so i cant see all the stretch marks
Not going to lie- I'm a little freaked out camping right now. This is one of those high activities you don't do by yourselves...or close to bears
I seriously think the toilet is the cleanest thing in their house. At least if I have to worry its not about that.
I may not be his cup of tea, but I bet I'm his 10th shot of tequila
So I couldn't find Leif..... He fell asleep in our closet upstairs trying to get changed into warmer clothes
just blew him in the library. I am a classy dame
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