Help. Asians are flirting in front of me(773): They speak asian
I'm not an expert but calling her the "hot lesbian" isn't going to coerce her into a 3some with you
i'm gonna start fucking more girls with asthma. help feed my ego.
It's cheaper then a lap dance and you get your hair cut.
They made out. Sounded like hippos drinking water
i don't know what part of 'duct tape bikini waxes' seemed even a little okay in our drunk minds, but i'm never drinking with your sister again
I'm not going to say what I did. You're smart enough to figure it out. But I did it. And you owe me 20$
YOU CANT FOOL THE TOILET
Under no circumstances is tits McGee to make that kind of decision about my life!
It was one of those mornings when I wake up and feel like I have to say sorry to the whole world
I was going to be upset with you on moral grounds but then i realized free chocolate was involved
Listen. The next time my first idea in the morning is "hometown buffet and a water bottle full of captain morgan", please make me go back to sleep.
Are you telling me right now that the weed man sexted you?
THE WEED MAN SEXTED ME!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Panties = found
Is it wrong for me to wish my cat had arms to get me a beer?
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