I was about to buy asher roth's album and then i realized he was a ginger. can't support
we're microwaving frozen margaritas its not the same without u
Its the little things i like about bein home like having actual toilet paper instead of subway napkins
Let me begin my 3 part apology by saying that you are a wonderful human being...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
And dont tell me its his job to cockblock me just because he's my boyfriend.
Hypothetically, if a stripper with braces bites you on the cleavage and it leaves an open wound, do you need a tetanus shot?
That boy needs some memories to take back home with him
Apparently "dick me" was not the response he was looking for.
Last night all you did was whine about how you needed something new and exciting
Is THAT why I woke up with dreadlocks?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Look, as flattering as it is, I'm getting a little tired of being everyone's go-to girl for a threesome.
"I'm pretty sure all our toasts were to Ben Afflecks penis last night."
Fyi, shaking your genitals at me doesn't count as "trying to have sex".
She just asked me if I was going to stay the night. I responded "I know that we are upside down".
Actually I learned to fire a 357 Magnum at the age of ten while on my very first period
And I mentioned the burning debate about your circumcision in my Christmas card to your mom.
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