my debutante medallion kept hitting his balls when i went down on him
An eyelash just fell out into my container of rice. Searching for it, i took a single piece of rice out at a time coming to the coclusion that i should not be this high while eating rice.
It's sad that I have started checking out the ring finger before the rack...I'm getting old
She begged me for sex again. I felt like I was telling a homeless person I didn't have any change.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Hey I never found my wallet but i did find a bag of 14 soft taco supremes
I have your wallet. Trade you for the tacos.
Would it help you get over me if I told you that I had unprotected sex last night?
Someone just got kicked out of the mall for being dressed like a giant cat. I feel like this is in your future.
Fyi your toilet is not contaminated. We'd have to scissor pretty hard to pass what I got.
I hate him. I fucked every one of his friends AND his fat brother and he still won't break up with me.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
"Stranger danger aquaman" were the last words i remember. help me.
The George Foreman grill is melted. I don't know what other problems could arise.
Because 9 pm Thursday you drink a loco cause you just wanna get drunk and have a good time with your friends. Then you wake up on Tuesday and you've had 17 locos and you're pregnant, lying on the side of the road, 3 states over. THAT'S why we don't have only locos parties.
Still pimpin that dick in the cornfields. Now it's just transferred to the local bar.
Say what you want about my van, but I've got more action there than in my apartment. A body pillow and a joint still go a long way!
You know how last week before we left I was drinking outta that blue cup and I left it sitting across the road. Well, it hadn't moved and my family just found it, brought it inside and cleaned it. I think this cup is my soulmate.
Randomize