i keep myself tagged when other girls look bad/ugly so i look better
Girls should come with a carfax report
Just got roadhead in a driving snowstorm. That shit should be a Winter X games event.
I spiked my fruit smoothie. Taking bikini season diet to a whole new level
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
no i had to finish in the bathroom to a pic of her mom in a bikini.
I'm walking home wearing Kermit the frog footie pajamas, carrying a monogrammed shot glass set with my name on it. It's fucking Christmas!
I am still STD free so as far as I am concerned I never went to panama.
Just know I'm having fun but I still have my motor functions.
she was literally 3 feet away from the garbage can, said she couldn't make it, and then proceeded to vomit on the floor in front of everyone in the restaurant
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You is good. You is important. You is a slut.
WEED IS MY SPIRIT ANIMAL
That one probably shouldn't have been in caps
Condoms and Ice Cream, that's all we need.
I want to fling myself into the sun
If my life today were a movie the subtitle would be: Revenge of the Beer Shits
Dude, seriously, fucking stop introducing me as "Thomas, with the dick piercing." you are the worst wingman ever.
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