are we going to glenview for practice??
(3 hrs later) aids
where r u? what is story? im way too high right now
community service is like the breakfast club... except we're all the criminal.
You were doing downward dog and puking off my deck at the same time.
and i fell asleep on top of a grilled cheese sandwich. not the best decision. but not the worst.
What's the appropriate way to phrase "If you ever leave your wife give me a call. But we can still have sex periodically until then."??
Everytime the frat boy touches his bro's ass after making a cup take a drink
I'm cheerleading for traffic. people are staring. Why am i the only high person on the way to class?
I greatly enjoy being related to her. Even if is it only by a penis.
Bringing families together since 1987
you haven't really lived until you are in a situation where your vagina is hanging out
His dick is so big it could be an arm rest.
Just wanted to let you know it's 3am and, at this point, I believe your sister has more of my semen in her than I do. So suck on that, fuckface.
you just have the mind of an innocent, non-tainted child.
YOU KNOW THAT'S BULLSHIT BECAUSE YOU'RE THE REASON IT'S BULLSHIT
I wish there was an emoji for sad lady boners
it’s not easy to sexualize brunch. work with me, babe.
Mid thrust, say hold on I need a pic for my friend.
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