my sex list reads like a who's who of mcdonald's general managers
They need to add a relationship status option on fb that says "having the baby of..."
I just busted my ass on the ice in front of my entire AA meeting. As if being there wasn't embarrassing enough.
No. one of us needs a degree and I am already the alcoholic friend. I can't do everything
apparently i'm the only person who has heard from her since saturday. she texted me "burt reynolds" at 2am sunday
Even the paramedic said "what a way to kill a party"
After this weekend, it looks come this holiday season I'll be walking in a winter abortionland.
There are eight sets of guys I've made out with who have the same name. It's like noah's ark in my mouth.
i remember going to sleep after the 4th time i threw up this morning and hoping i didn't have to again because then it would be uneven between saturday and sunday. my ocd is getting out of control
why does CNN give a flying $@*# about the royal baby so, so much?
i hope they name him Joffrey
Can we just talk about how the only thing I have on my camera from this weekend is a video of you putting your whole fist in your mouth hahahha
You were typing for me while I was hyperventilating into a paper bag on the floor.
An d I'd rather cry while putting a waffle in my mouth than cry on my pillow, ya feel me?
You said "I'm not gonna waste my last condom on you" last night.
my dad walked in on me peeing into the trashcan in our kitchen last night at like 2am. wtf
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