The shirt is mine, the pants are mine, the bra not so much
Omg. Get me out of here. Someone is playing michelle branch.
Grab the Coors Light. Its time to get NASCAR drunk
i just dedicated my kegstand to your breasts
Would you like me to write a persuasive essay on how you should let me suck your dick?
Get everyone out of their dorms and watch 3 girls do the walk of shame from my room.
She wants an explanation of my cousins creepy foot fetish with my god sister. i don't know how I can sum this up in a text.
I just tipped the cab driver with pistachio nuts. And he loved it.
I'm the man of the house if we're referring to livers.
Gross! What the hell is that?!?
It's quite clearly a man posing erotically with multiple packages of bacon.
I woke up with your vibrator in my face
That jawline could fucking have its way with me.
I can't tell if my need for dick is more than my want to strangle him
short story short, i just screamed anal seepage in the middle of a diner.
ok, muffins say "love me", waffles say "fuck me", got it.
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