Goodnight my chunky, little, marshmallow muncher
Bea Arthur died! :(
What?
Big bird passed.
I think most guys look at porn as a fallback career. I mean I know I do.
I think you're asking the wrong person. You don't understand. Like I would fuck the act of fucking itself if I could.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I look like a herd of wild horses chewed on my back. If you bite me again while taking me from behind, I'm going to have to cut you off.
She had her insurance card taped to her arm because it was the only thing she "couldn't take off and lose"
he also bled all over my floor. unrelated to cats but true nonetheless.
You can't text people with drinkers' regret at 8 in the morning. It's just bad form.
Speaking of mom and dad and Halloween... Mom bought a size small slutty nurse outfit last night. So yeah, they're getting hammered
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I got back from work this morning after working the night shift to find an NFL player scaling the side of our apartment...from your window. He just took sneaking out to all new level. Care to explain?
I think that about sums it up, actually.
I went to a community college and majored in Bad Decisions. I'm not exactly a chick magnet.
You mowed a straight line through three yards because you were, and I fucking quote, "In the zone." I think they know.
I just did a walk of shame on my own block. one of the old neighbors saw and greeted me "good morning, girl next door"
Should probably stop going into the gas station to look for the most normal person to hitch a ride with to drive me to a party
Is there any chance of you maybe wanting a bouncy house at your wedding. Like maybe a .0001 chance. If so I would totally chip in for that.
Randomize