Seriously, stop being so datable w your movie/song prefs
i hope S**** or M***** or someone took note of the fact that i was drinking popov like water and could no longer form sentences. i mean, dont get me wrong i had been thinking about boning R*** long before my sobriety left the picture but the number of reasons not to, outweighed the temptation and without sir robert burnett as R***'s wingman, it would have never happened
please tell me I'm in your upstairs bedroom. Just google mapped myself and I have no idea where I am.
glad you had fun, i did too. am rubbing aloe on my butt now.
Apparently I'm the guy that didn't get the memo that Afliction and wifebeaters were the proper attire for tonight... so I'll just sit here alone in my sweatervest and be judged.
I think one day, after evolution kicks in, my sons will thank me for having a 3rd ball. That's how much sex I'm having.
Hes warming up week old McDonalds french fries, putting hot sauce on them, and counting them with his shirt off.
we just plugged the camera up to the big screen. would you like to come see what you did last night, in high definition?
i should not be allowed to orgasm that much in one day.
Tried to bribe the bartender with wedding cake. Felt bad for not giving her a tip.
Just put a dog collar on someone's child.....was a great hit with everyone but his mom.......I think she hates me. I'm okay.with that
In mid-threesome, need more condoms. Wearing a sheet to the gas station. I'll keep you posted
it is a toga and you are a goddess.
I think the 8 yr old is hitting on me and they just prayed for the salvation of third world countries
Boise Idaho, where you have a one night stand with someone from your town 3 states away and run into them the day you return...
I see your creepy poodle photo and raise you a shirtless elderly gentleman who looks like a yetti in cutoffs who may or may not have an ENORMOUS erection.
.... touche....
Randomize
