I wanna bring you to show and tell
FUCK TREES I CLIMB BUOYS MOTHERFUCKER
STOP listening to that song
he proceeded to punch 3 mailboxes in a row and when i asked him why, he said "because they were talking shit"... i need a new boyfriend. and a new life.
She pulled a cheeseburger out of her purse. I have missed her so much.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i was considerably less excited after they told me my present didnt have a penis
I'm functioning at the level of a challenged walrus.
eta to your mouth 5 minutes
Please take a moment of silence for the fact that I still have all 10 fingers
My favorite bartender added me on Facebook. Now he can clearly see how under 21 I am
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
But wait then while giving his drive thru order he goes in mid sentence, "Hey baby it's Travis remember me?"
Quote from doctor, "that is a VERY angry vagina".
I'm fucked.
I am going to paint butt plugs like little Christmas trees and give them as gifts.
You could paint cock rings as wreaths.
He referred to his penis as "The Purple Headed Yogurt Slinger." I'm both disgusted and turned on
My ex unfollowed me on SPOTIFY bruh. Freaking spotify. The butthurt is real
Nothing quite like spending your evening singing Shania Twain I Feel Like a Woman barbershop quartet Style with some homeless guys outside of Keyport liquor. love Shania Twain. How's your Sunday?
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