I haven't seen him in over a year. He asked me to his prom over myspace. Is he fucking serious?
How come it tastes like onions whenever I go down on her?
I'm starting a business if you want to get involved
oh boy
Its called Cut N Tugs, haircuts with happy endings
You finger a girl once and she thinks she loves you. I'm going back to boys. Lesbians are needy.
ya i found him eventually. hes the only one who drinks guiness so I just had to follow the darkest green puke trail
I tried to explain to him that we just wanted a stereotypical black friend to be in our group. He didn't take it too well... Never take me to the bar again.
My dildo fell into the bathtub. It sounded like a chainsaw.
its likemy ribs anf my hesrt aew cuddlingn
Getting a vibrator would be like waving the white flag of surrender in this war against my vagina and its hormone army.
Of course I will... FYI I just gave my balls a crew cut.
Do you know how many guys' fantasies I've been told I'm a part of lately?!
Just 2. But still.
Who put the meatball sub on my door handle?
Way to go. Now you have no beer and I have a cold tit.
Its not something you can force it it just has to happen like a rainbow or pooping
Ugh. All the good hoes are in their third trimester.
Randomize
