i kinda do this "flirt with girls and pretend to be a hot white guy named chris" thing
I kiss like a newly born barfing kangaroo
I really need to stop carrying a flask around with me in my backpack at school..
Aren't you in 8th grade?
9th, but that's not the point.
The world would have a new energy source if someone would just take a blacklight to the backseat of that slut's car
These 33 Eskimo Brothers Boinked The Same Person And Couldn’t Be More Proud
What happened to chicks over dicks?
That rule does not apply to 9 inch dicks..
HEAR YE, HEAR YE! BY ROYAL DECREE, I WILL BE KNOCKING ON YOUR DOOR AT 2PM UNLESS YOU GET THE FUCK UP. IT'S 1:50. CIGARETTE TIME, BITCH. I LOVE YOU.
She was giving me head while we were in my tree house, my mom then came out to let the dog out so she stopped so I would stop groaning, was it good? You tell me
Sorry about all of the penis things that happened last night.
Dude there is a stripper at my door saying she has my birthday present. She knows my name...but it's not my birthday...
God works in mysterious ways my friend.
17 Inappropriate Things People Did With Instruments
I ended up in a bathroom giving my hymen a pep talk
drunk brunch me or lose me forever
So....I just took a paddle fan on high speed to the side of the head while getting head...still finished the job, good thing I'm drunk and couldn't feel it.
Opened my notebook to coke all over the pages. So, if that's any indication on how this weekend went.
I would date him. For 1 month. Just so I could say I was a trap queen for 1 month.
Please tell me you did not shit your Disney princess costume.