i puked out the bus window last night on the way home. i remember it, but i don't remember everyone else screaming to put their windows up.
i had the deer in headlights look when she walked in and i was digging in her hamper
We put her face under a blacklight.....it looked like fireworks
operation have a gay friend backfired
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
were drug buddies, doing lines off her ass is just a bonus
She tried to kill herself by taking a whole packet of panadol. I mean HELLO THAT'S ME EVERY SUNDAY MORNING.
I forgot my id and a man called soup is buying me vodka.
I was really excited when he said that condoms didn't fit him, then he added "they fall right off"...
Dude. I only took a 20 out the ATM last night. How do I have 83 ones?
You stole from the strippers again. I wish I was ninja like you
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
the only thing you said was do the helicopter dick
Ive fucked up. im like a feral dog rabidly chasing an infrequent dream amidst a cataclysm of disaster
I woke up with chocolate melted between my tits. I'd say that's a win for all parties involved.
Saw a dude last night at a strip club's bar eating canned pineapple and giving tootsie pops to the girls...
honestly dont worry about it, its not the first time ive injured myself on a potted cactus during sexual relations with a woman
Good news! Blood’s flowing!
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