It's not littering; it's giving birds nest building suplies. Besides, birds love soy sauce and plastic forks.
The only thing I can remember you saying is "I won't cut pizza like this when I'm older."
A girl just asked me to co-sign for her boob job because she didn't have enough credit built up. This is a first.
Pregnancy confirmed. Complete emotional instability achieved. I just cried through 95% of Avatar.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just found 17 dollars of saltine crackers in my room. confused incredibly. suprised not at all.
In reality u ask do u have beer at your house but what your really saying is will there be cock in my mouth
i never thought i could drink so much vodka in 8 minutes
Is it too much to ask that I wake up one morning with out a pic of your dick as my wallpaper??
He added his name to my To Do list. That's the way to my Type A heart.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Let us ponder on the good times. Ya know when the Jonas brothers were incapable of growing facial hair and I didn't fully understand what a dick looks like
I forgot my backup drink is supposed to be pedialyte and vodka. Add in the shit I'm losing as I drink. Win-Win right?
Also I told several people at the bar last night that my dad the alligator wrestler died wrestling an alligator. So if anyone asks that's real.
Hella random but just hear me out...A bar that is a petting zoo. Bitches love petting zoos.
I spilled wine on my pillowcase and I figure it's basically my lifeblood so I'm just leaving it
Wait I can't come yet Mr. Brightside is playing
ok i defs just took my shirt off in the middle of a frat party though so keep me updated
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