I don't understand why some guys want to have a huge conversation while standing at the urinal with cock in hand...
she just made me lysol my hands in order to touch her tits.
He seriously just asked the doctor if taking the medicine for chlamydia was going to cut into his drinking time. Never let it be said that he is not dedicated.
Me either. I want to get 'chase a stray cat through the neighborhood in my hooker heels' drunk. And it's your birthday, so you have to get 'best friend holding your hair while you puke in the bar bathroom and cry about your life' drunk. In a feather boa.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just threw up in the MSO airport men's room. We're at that point this morning.
were facing impending death from north korea and were sitting here snorting tylenol to get high.....where did our lives go wrong?
So what's the moral standing on reading gay porn on your phone whilst sitting next to your 87 year old Grandma?
All I've done this weekend is cum and drink. I think it's safe to say I'm dehydrated.
I mean I'm not gay but a hundred bucks is a hundred bucks
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Also the bouncer Straight up told me my id was shitty and I should get a new one. But he let me in anyways because #boobz
got a blowjob in the bar bathroom, got arrested for public intoxication, and found a big bag of weed on the ground on my walk home from the station. my friday night could have been a movie
Oh wow and I have a bunch of portable wine glasses called to go coffee cups
Don't tell him that you hope he dies in a boring missionary position with his wife. That doesn't go over well.
I pour the whiskey from now on
I miss the pre Covid days when we could meet men in bars. Hitting on guys in the grocery store is just depressing
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