If this place produced love children they would be born wearing Lilly Pullitzer with raging coke addictions.
my little brother just caught me blowing my step cousin in the lobby bathroom at our family reunion
currently walking past a fire hyrdrant with a hose already attatched.. this could be dangerous..
i pounded out a 17-yr-old on saturday night
no, that is not a typo
i turned her down on fri night, googled the state consent laws & then caved on saturday
And when I say "complete whore" I mean I could possibly make a shameful profit by wearing this.
I'm sorry that spending new years with you was fucking my boyfriend in your bathroom multiple times
He's 11. You dont draw dicks on 11 year olds, i dont care if he ate your lasagna
Being the only sober one.. I had to feed you guys doritos. You kept licking my fingers.
I don't remember, but I believe your goodnight phrase was "nice meeting you, thanks for not macing me"
I can't help but look at my sex life and acknowledge that this is not normal behavior.
I woke up with the gnarliest cold/hangover combo
Thats what u get when u have butt ass naked rooftop sex at night in december
Worth it.
I've had my dick out in public way too much for someone my age...
Dude, seriously, fucking stop introducing me as "Thomas, with the dick piercing." you are the worst wingman ever.
Drunk and bowling. Only good things can come of this
Tell her that we understand the angle wasn't the best on the first video and that we forgive her.
Randomize
