I am not sure how to feel about the fact that I was turned on by someone with a penis. I can't believe Lady Gaga would do this to me. :(
he kept a regular condom in his wallet just so he could comment on how it wouldnt fit before whipping out the magnums. i give him points for the build up
You love him. Dinosaurs. Math. Sex.
that's the best thing i've ever said to a penis
The drunk fake out is her specialty. She'll agree to come with us and two seconds later we check to make sure she's still there and we see her booking it down the hall in the opposite direction.
Also, I want you to know, that not only am I apparently the expert on sexting. Our bishop is consulting me later. So my talents are varied.
You're the horniest male I have ever encountered
Makes it sound like you're a scientist documenting your discoveries. I warned you.
Literally just had a girl put her street name into my phone. Yeah.
I'm going as your incestuous sister. If thats not the perfect winglady I don't know what is.
If you get laid dressed as my dad that makes me extremely uncomfortable
Can we relax the "married man" rule just once?
You lost me at unexpected butt stuff. Everything else I would probably do.
So his dick was definitely bigger than it looked in all the pictures he sent my daughter.
U sent me lyrics to wind beneath my wings
My liver misses your liver
if it makes you feel any better you looked really comfortable while you were sleepin in the closet, atleast according to the pictures i woke up with on my phone
Randomize
