Piggyback rides are my preferred mode of transportation.
I got vodka in my stocking. Having an alcoholic mom has paid off.
How far into the semester do we have to be before it's ok to get drunk in between classes again?
you woke me up in the middle of the night to tell me you were taking off your pants and it was not an invitation.
If you bring me a slurpee and advil I will eat you out for like an hour.
i guess when we were done i grunted "unforgiveable" and walked out.
Same here... Well I was planning on having some sort of deep conversation, but looking at how grim of an outlook tomorrow has on you, I'll just re-inform you that I have your pants.
Sometimes you just need a break, and sometimes you also need to get stoned on these breaks. I sound like some kind of fucked up mr rogers when I say shit like that.
Life gets in the way of sexy Saturday sometimes
Sitting in the library studying = googling how to get laid in the library.
I'll be there. With Doritos and whisky. Don't expect much more.
Where's Taylor bro?
Never mind found him under the sink
My booty call fought through ice and a foot of snow to get here. He brought booze, food, and cigarettes for three days. My vagina is the greatest motivator of all time.
Worst. Date. Ever. He peeled a layer of bread off his mini burger buns because they had "too many carbs".
sarah's view on last night: a threesome to make things less awkward. oh, well done.
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